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Old 03-04-2013, 02:20 PM   #1
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Obituary

Heard the following obituary for the Pillsbury Doughboy:

Last Saturday the Doughboy was interred in a lightly greased coffin, the gravesite piled high with flours.

Dozens of celebrities attended the services to pay their respects, including Hungry Jack, Mrs. Butterworth, Betty Crocker, Cap'n Crunch, and the California Raisins.

Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, lovingly describing the deceased as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.

She went on to say that he was not really much of a smart cookie, as he wasted a lot of his dough on half-baked schemes. And although he was a little flaky at times, he was a crusty old man who was considered a positive roll model for millions of America's cooks.

Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, their children John Dough and Jane Dough, sister Dosey Dough, the one still in the oven, and his father Pop Tart.

Memorial contributions may be made directly to the family, as they are a bit short on dough after funeral expenses.
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Old 03-06-2013, 02:11 PM   #2
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Two young brothers ages 7 and 6 where up in the room early one morning when the older one says to the younger one, I think we are old enough to start cussing; I will say **** and you say hell when we go down to breakfast. Their mother calls them for breakfast and the two head downstairs where the mother says to the oldest "What do you want today". The oldest says I'm tired of the same old "****" I'll have some Cheerios: with that the mother races around the table and slaps him on the side of the head, then drags him upstairs to his room with him kicking and screaming. The mother comes back down and says to the younger brother "OK what will you have for breakfast". The younger one give here a pensive look and says " I sure as hell don't want no Cheerios"
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