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Old 08-27-2015, 10:06 AM   #1
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Nosy Neighbors and Judgement after New RV and Truck Purchase

So, we bought a new Ram 1500 truck and a TT in the past two weeks. I've had two different neighbors come over and say things like "wow did you guys win the lottery" or "we want your jobs". This bugs me. Has anyone else experienced this after making their new RV purchase?

It's not like we even paid full retail for these items, we got a great trade in for our existing truck (which didn't have the towing capacity we wanted). I negotiated really good prices on both items. In fact, they were about 30k together, which we financed. In the scheme of things, it's not a big deal, since it only amounts to $180 more in payments. We both work full time and budget our money carefully. At full retail, it looks like we have 56k worth of equipment in the driveway now, but that's not the real story.

I almost feel guilty - like I should apologize for having these "luxury items". Especially when people make comments like I mentioned above.

Does anyone else have this issue after making this kind of purchase? I feel like people think it's frivolous and extravagant and that there is judgement all over the place - even from family and certainly from neighbors.

I know I shouldn't care what others think, but I do.
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Old 08-27-2015, 10:13 AM   #2
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When my kids were little, we called jealousy, "The Green Eyed Monster".


Your neighbors wish they could have the shiny new toy you just bought.


Ignore them and enjoy the life you have chosen to live!
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Old 08-27-2015, 10:17 AM   #3
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My neighbors are awesome people and would never think of saying anything like that. I'm sure your neighbors are just jealous.

I did have my boss' boss tell him once that I must be overpaid because I purchased a Lexus SUV. The Lexus was used and I had traded in a paid off vehicle for it, so the payment was LOW.

Who cares what people think. You only have one life to live. Enjoy it.
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Old 08-27-2015, 10:19 AM   #4
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Just say "Yes"...none of their business how you paid for it and it makes for good gossip.
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Old 08-27-2015, 10:21 AM   #5
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Just tell 'em you spent your kid's inheritance money.....I bet they'll change the conversation.
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Old 08-27-2015, 10:23 AM   #6
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You nailed it in the last line; "I know I shouldn't care what others think ..."

A lot of people don't understand the realities behind what things cost. A lot of them don't understand budgeting, and A LOT of them don't understand what "hard work" and "saving money" and "living frugally" is. And a lot of people are just naturally judgy.

I've had a few friends make comments like that. And I simply tell them it's not as expensive or "extravagant" as they think. In the big scheme of things, it's really quite reasonable. How much do they spend on whatever they spend money on? I bet they spend more on "leisure" or "non-essentials" than they think they do. This is just how you've chosen to spend your time and money; none of their business. I work hard for my money, and I have all my life, how I choose to spend it is no one's business but mine and my wife's.

I also (only half jokingly) say things like "you only live once" and "you can't take it with you". But I really believe those things. Why suffer now (within reason of course) for some lofty cushy retirement that is NEVER going to happen (especially with the way the government is spending my retirement money) when I can live my life NOW, while I'm healthy enough to enjoy things? (it should be obvious that I'm fairly young; this is not necessarily a view for someone in their sunset years living on a fixed income, or maybe it is...)

Now, I'm not saying people shouldn't plan for the future. And I'm not saying people shouldn't save for retirement. I'm just saying that we only get one time around on this roller coaster, and I mean to make the most of my ride!
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Old 08-27-2015, 10:26 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by llilith View Post
So, we bought a new Ram 1500 truck and a TT in the past two weeks. I've had two different neighbors come over and say things like "wow did you guys win the lottery" or "we want your jobs". This bugs me. Has anyone else experienced this after making their new RV purchase?

It's not like we even paid full retail for these items, we got a great trade in for our existing truck (which didn't have the towing capacity we wanted). I negotiated really good prices on both items. In fact, they were about 30k together, which we financed. In the scheme of things, it's not a big deal, since it only amounts to $180 more in payments. We both work full time and budget our money carefully. At full retail, it looks like we have 56k worth of equipment in the driveway now, but that's not the real story.

I almost feel guilty - like I should apologize for having these "luxury items". Especially when people make comments like I mentioned above.

Does anyone else have this issue after making this kind of purchase? I feel like people think it's frivolous and extravagant and that there is judgement all over the place - even from family and certainly from neighbors.

I know I shouldn't care what others think, but I do.

My wife gets embarrassed all the time with her family over this as well. She made me keep my truck and camper a secret from everyone and to just let them "find out' on their own. Her co-workers called her Rockefeller after we bought her new truck then mine just a couple months later. Then...the trailer. It really is embarrassing in a way.
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Old 08-27-2015, 10:29 AM   #8
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Originally Posted by JFlightRisk View Post
Just tell 'em you spent your kid's inheritance money.....I bet they'll change the conversation.
I'm totally doing this!

You guys are right on the money (no pun intended) with your comments on this. Thank you for the reality check. It really is no one's business. And, all it really takes to have nice things is working hard and planning/budgeting well. We do both, and so YAY!!!
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Old 08-27-2015, 10:34 AM   #9
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Good advice is yet just one of the services we all offer. Hope you're at ease!
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Old 08-27-2015, 10:48 AM   #10
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Something else that bothers me and is along the same vein:

Some of our friends think we "spend too much" on our "stuff". For example, when I buy something, I intend to KEEP it, so I buy the highest quality I can afford. I take care of it. I do the maintenance. I fix it when it's broken, and cry when it breaks. My belongings are not "commodities" to me.

Some of those friends who judge me for what I spend my money on don't take care of their belongings at all. It's just stuff to them to be replaced when they break it or wear it out, which happens faster because they don't take care of it. Oil changes get neglected, the cheapest tires get installed, things never get cleaned or washed, etc. And it's big stuff like houses and cars.

We may spend a little more than they do on what they may consider "non-essentials", but we plan to keep those things for a long time, and we want them to be nice, so we work hard to keep our things that way. It really bothers me when people say stuff like that and their 4 year old car looks like it needs to be scrapped, and their $200K house looks like it should be condemned ...

Sorry for the rant, but I stopped worrying what people like that think about what I buy a LONG time ago.
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