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08-07-2021, 10:19 AM
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#1
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 5,014
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Bear On The Roof
"A man in northern Minnesota woke up one morning to find a bear on his roof. He looked in the Yellow Pages, and sure enough, there was an ad for "Up North Bear Removers." He called the number listed and the bear remover said he'd be over within an hour.
The bear remover arrived, and got out of his van. He had a ladder, a baseball bat, a 12 gauge shotgun, and a mean looking, heavily scarred old pit bull.
"What are you going to do?" the homeowner asked.
"I'm going to put this ladder up against the roof, then I'm going to go up there, and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat. When the bear falls off the roof, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles, and not let go. The bear will then be subdued enough for me to put him in the cage in the back of the van."
He then handed the shotgun to the homeowner.
"What's the shotgun for?" the homeowner asked.
"If the bear knocks me off the roof, you shoot the dog."
Murff
__________________
Murff
2015 White Hawk 20MRB (It's last year)
2017 F150 2.7 Eco Boost 3.73 Gears
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08-07-2021, 10:47 AM
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#2
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2017
Location: Nor Cal
Posts: 3,116
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Murff
"A man in northern Minnesota woke up one morning to find a bear on his roof. He looked in the Yellow Pages, and sure enough, there was an ad for "Up North Bear Removers." He called the number listed and the bear remover said he'd be over within an hour.
The bear remover arrived, and got out of his van. He had a ladder, a baseball bat, a 12 gauge shotgun, and a mean looking, heavily scarred old pit bull.
"What are you going to do?" the homeowner asked.
"I'm going to put this ladder up against the roof, then I'm going to go up there, and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat. When the bear falls off the roof, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles, and not let go. The bear will then be subdued enough for me to put him in the cage in the back of the van."
He then handed the shotgun to the homeowner.
"What's the shotgun for?" the homeowner asked.
"If the bear knocks me off the roof, you shoot the dog."
Murff
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Thanks for a great laugh first thing this morning, Murff! 
__________________
2018 JayFlight SLX 212QBW
1999 Ford F-250 Super Duty Lariat SC, 7.3L PSD, 3.73
Transfer Flow 50 gal aux; Andersen WDH; Prodigy P2
😁 "If a man says he’ll fix something, he will. There’s no need to remind him every 6 months.
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08-07-2021, 02:55 PM
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#3
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Missouri City, The Republic of Texas
Posts: 5,063
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That’s cruel. We should at least consider what the bear would want.
__________________
Cheers,
T_
2013 F-350 CC SB 2WD 6.7PS
2013 Eagle Premier 351 RLTS
-SOLD- 2012 X23B
-SOLD- 2003 Ford Expedition 5.4, Bilstein shocks
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08-09-2021, 05:48 AM
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#4
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Dallas
Posts: 4,281
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John Boy and Billy did a skit on this. Funny as hell
__________________
Tight Lines and accurate shots
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08-09-2021, 09:00 AM
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#5
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2019
Location: Northern California
Posts: 1,994
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Thank you Murff . I needed a good laugh this morning!
__________________
1984 gmc k1500 4x4 s/w/b. s/b 350,700r4,373 diff,.restored and upgraded( retired - sold). 2022 Chevy Z-71 Trail Boss 4x4 crew cab s/w/b 6.2 gas a/t. 2018 hummingbird Baja 16mrb,Yamaha ef2400ishc inverter.
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08-11-2021, 06:02 AM
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#6
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2020
Location: SW Lower Michigan
Posts: 2,516
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LOL Well, at least he's been successful to this point.
__________________
John & Jennifer and family
2018 Jayco White Hawk 31BH 34'
2004 Surveyor by Forest River 29'
1996 Coachman Catalina 25'
2002 Jayco 12UTD PopUp
TrashMan Videos
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