Five Surgeons

Murff · 02-13-2018, 05:43 PM

Five surgeons from big cities are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on.

The first surgeon from New York says "I like accountants. When you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second surgeon from Chicago responds. "Yeah, but you should try electricians. Everything inside them is color coded."

The third surgeon from Dallas says, "I really think librarians are best, everything inside them is in alphabetical order"

The fourth surgeon from Los Angeles chimes in "You know, I like construction workers... those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over."

But the fifth surgeon from Washington DC shut them all up when he observed."You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine... Plus the head and the ass are interchangeable!"

Murff

WinnieView · 02-13-2018, 05:51 PM

If it weren't a joke it may not survive.

Tunce the traveler · 02-13-2018, 06:08 PM

I really like that one.

JohnWedell · 02-13-2018, 06:26 PM

It’s like they say;
A politician can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you look forward to the trip.

merlinhomeauto · 02-13-2018, 06:39 PM

Well said.

Lady Fitzgerald · 02-13-2018, 06:51 PM

What's so funny? It's true.

Stingray75 · 02-13-2018, 06:59 PM

RedHorse1 · 02-13-2018, 07:47 PM

Murff ripped that one from today’s headlines.

**norty1** · 02-14-2018, 06:47 AM

A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale ' He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.

The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there. 'You talk?' he asks.

'Yep,' the Lab replies.

After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?'

The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young.

I wanted to help the government, so... I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.'

'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running...But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.'

'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.'

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

'Ten dollars,' the guy says.

'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'

'Because he's a liar. He's never been out of the yard.'

shrpshtr · 02-14-2018, 06:58 AM

Both are great!

**norty1** · 02-15-2018, 08:13 AM

A fellow decided to buy his girl some perfume for Valentine's day, so he went to the cosmetic counter in his girl's favorite store. The prices were horrific! No matter what the sales lady showed him, even the tiniest bottles were beyond his budget.

Finally, he asked her: "Can you show me something really cheap?"
She handed him a mirror.

Lady Fitzgerald · 02-15-2018, 01:14 PM

Diapers and politicians need to be changed frequently...both for the same reasons.

RAurand · 02-15-2018, 03:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lady Fitzgerald

Diapers and politicians need to be changed frequently...both for the same reasons.

YES, I AGREE but it seems the voting public don't seem to do that enough!
Should completely clean house every 4 years!

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