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Old 09-24-2015, 08:12 AM   #1
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Joke for today

The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered, "Hello?"

Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?" "Yes", whispered the small voice. "May I talk with him?" the man asked. To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No." Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?" "Yes", came the answer. "May I talk with her?" Again the small voice whispered, "No."

Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child. "Is there any one there besides you?" the boss asked the child.

"Yes" whispered the child, "a policeman." Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?" "No, he's busy," whispered the child. "Busy doing what?" asked the boss. "Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman", came the whispered answer.

Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?" "A hello-copper" answered the whispering voice. "What is going on there?" asked the boss, now alarmed.

In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper." Alarmed, concerned, and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for?" Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle: "Me!"
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Old 09-24-2015, 10:26 AM   #2
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A crew of knucklheads were building a garage. The foreman observed one new carpenter picking thru his bag of nails and discarding some of them. After awhile he went over to inquire why.

The guy explains that the heads are on the wrong end.







down





down




down




down






Baffled, the foreman explains to him that those nails go on the other side of the garage.

This is the only clean joke I ever remember hearing my father (RIP) tell.
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Old 12-30-2015, 10:55 AM   #3
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To the Moon

Been There?
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to the moon!.jpg  
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Old 12-30-2015, 11:17 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by norty1 View Post
Been There?
LOL

OMG.... How old do you have to be to get that one.... I'll admit took me a few seconds.
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Old 12-30-2015, 11:28 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tex1961 View Post
LOL

OMG.... How old do you have to be to get that one.... I'll admit took me a few seconds.
I got it right away! But I wondered a few seconds who 'OMG' was.

I must be old!
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Old 12-30-2015, 11:32 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tex1961 View Post
LOL

OMG.... How old do you have to be to get that one.... I'll admit took me a few seconds.
I got it right away. I think only those who qualify for AARP will get it. 50+
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Old 12-30-2015, 11:46 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tex1961 View Post
LOL

OMG.... How old do you have to be to get that one.... I'll admit took me a few seconds.
Had to ask Dr. Google. Still don't get the 'toon... too young I guess... never seen the show, but have heard of it in passing...

Oh ... wait, I think I get it! "To the moon Alice"!?
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Old 12-30-2015, 09:03 PM   #8
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OMG = Old Miller Gold

Happy New Year

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Old 12-30-2015, 10:04 PM   #9
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LSMFT
















Lucky Strike Means Fine Tobacco
My father preferred Chesterfields.
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